Facebook...

I remember last year, the time when I still do not have a facebook account. It was the first week of school and every body was talking about this social network for them to contact each other and keep in touch for the years to come. I think each student in our class has an account and the only exception is me. I don't know why I didn't know facebook that time. So I was just listening to my friends and try to know what is facebook and how can I make an account for myself but I had second thoughts because this could be an ultimate distraction in my studies and all the things I do every day. I had no choice, I have to make an account because every body else is using it already for communication, announcements of our assignments and projects, schedules of classes and so many important things. There...I made one! http://www.facebook.com/BerniceMaffi 


I thought I will just use that if we have school works that are posted there and if I have to contact my classmates about group projects but no, there are so many things you can do that will make you addicted to it. Best example would be the games, if you have nothing to do in the internet the first thing you would want is a game to play on for past time but now, it's not just a past time for people, it's already an addiction. I could barely talk to my brother because of computer games and when he's using facebook, it's like he has his own world at home. I can see the different uses of this social network but just like any other addictions on computer, it has bad effects also to the users. Honestly, when I got addicted to it somehow I can't control myself from opening my account even if I have nothing to do. I will just open it, check if my friends are online, look at the pictures and post comments and that would be the start of the unending thread until we realize that it's already early in the morning. Even though this became a distraction for me in my studies, instead of me doing school works when I get home, first thing I would do is open my account and waste my time there. Nevertheless, I can still see that facebook is somehow useful. I got to connect with my relatives out of the country so easily and try to catch up with them through the pictures we are sending to each other. By this, we can still know the latest happenings in our family.


 This phenomenon created a big part in people's lives regardless of the age. Young and old do have facebook accounts. It is a way of introducing to people and re-connecting to old friends. In one way or another, you cannot deny that this social networking site separates you from the reality. People are fond using it because they want to engage in fantasy that is possible in facebook. Fantasy because some people create false identities just to have millions of friends who would want to connect with them. These people who you call "friends" are countless but do you really know them, and do they really know you personally? Do you think that if someone sees that you have thousands of friends in your account, others will admire you and think that you are a friendly person? The real essence of friendship is sinking and that is a sad truth. How can you say that a friend is a real one if the only way he/she could connect with you is through the little chat box in facebook or through the comments he/she is posting in your status and pictures? Isn't it if he/she is a true friend of yours he would do anything and would make an effort to come to you especially if he/she really wants to talk and spend time with you? I read in an article that the picture of you in your profile is not you. It is a persona, an avatar of yourself. Of course, the pictures you post in your account are the only pictures that would best present you. The pictures that will look you attractive and not the other way around. And people add you as their friends because of this mere representation of yourself.  Don't you realize that friendship is not only about the looks and outside being of a person, that friendship requires effort. In facebook, friendship is a lot easier than in real life. And that's what I hate about it! If you really want to be a true friend, go and meet them personally. Do something that a real friend would do. There are no successful relationships that are made only in a social networking site. Hands down to those people who use facebook properly and still know that there are things needed to be separated in real life.

“Social media should improve your life, 

not become your life!” 

- Patrick Driessen, Consultant and Executive Coach

"It is better to be in chains with friends , than to be in a garden with strangers."

 MY AC BARKADA

"I was alone when I first stepped into my college life.

 Whole new world for me, new environment, new faces, new challenges. 

Adjustments should be made as soon as I meet people that will be around me for the 4 years that I will stay in Assumption College." 

This is what I said to myself first day of being a freshman in AC. 

As far as I can remember the girls in the pictures above, they are not the ones who I am with the first days of school. We all have different accompanies and group of friends. Then suddenly, we merged into one group. At first, I thought that won't work because obviously we all have huge differences and interests. Of course if that is the case, our group will always be divided and who would like that kind of set-up in a BARKADA?

We are now in our second year in college and our group is getting stronger and trying to stay longer for each other. We experience challenges in the group like some kind of misunderstandings and even worse, fights. I know petty fights are only for high school and it's so immature already for us, college girls. But we are not always in control of everything. So what we always do is we try to fix it all up and make up for each others' mistakes. I am very thankful to have this pretty ladies! My actions won't show much but my heart knows how much I treasure our friendship and how much I want to keep it as long as we can. :"> 

Thank you MEG, SASSA, PAO, TAMMY, NARIKA, AHNDIE, NIKKI, MARA, TERE, GIX >:D<

Thank you for being part of my life. Thank you for letting me to be a part of yours also!

Thank you for your unending patience for me.

Thank you for understanding me every time I can't be with you.

I may not always say this but TRULY I LOVE YOU MY BABY GIRLS! >:D< :*

We're gonna graduate together! 2 years to go! LOL =)))

take a look back

Whole day in front of my computer wasn't that so enjoying. I was supposed to do school works but what I did was to look for pictures that I can upload and share in my facebook account. But I'm glad I did this because I saw all the scanned pictures of me when I was so young with my brother. 

WE WERE SO CUTE TOGETHER! :"> LOL

I remembered how I cry myself out of pain, embarrassment, irritation, and so much more because of my older brother. He always piss me off when we were younger. We're not that okay in terms of brother-sister relationship. He has his own world at home and I seldom get to talk with him, if he will speak to me I think it's always because he needs something from me or he would ask me for a favor. Yes it is a sad fact but I'm glad that after my 18th birthday, it changed and our relationship has a progress already. These are some of the things that I experience now that I never experienced before:

1. My brother knows how to text me now. (Before, he didn't even want me to have his number)
2. He sometimes would ask me where am I. (Before, he doesn't care where I am or where will I go)
3. He brings me "pasalubong" if I get a chance to ask him for one. (Before, he would never spend his money for me)
4. He once tried to suggest that I can go to a specific girl shop because he knew that I would love to go there. (Before, he wouldn't even think where would I want to go for shopping)
5. He escorted me when I walked through the carpet during my debut. ( Before, he hates to go near or walks beside me)

I love to hear my name from him. Whenever he says my name, it's like I always want to say "thank you kuya for saying my name". That's how much I feel the change now between us. And I am very happy! :D

Seeing our pictures together when we were young is so heart warming. :"> 

It's so sweet especially this one!

( This is my favorite :"> )

When I posted this in my facebook, my cousin commented. She said "that's so sweet!"

Then my brother responded, "parang hindi naman, nanghihingi lang ako pera nyan. haha"

I laughed so hard! =)) As if I already have money that time, I was only a baby! :P

Nevertheless, I still have the best brother in the world! I have my own reasons! :D Even if that, that and that! LOL =)) 

I never said this before...and now I want to shout it here in my blog.

I LOVE MY BROTHER SO MUCH!

We are worst enemies but we can be sweet at times in our own ways! 

not again!

After a night full of "kilig moments" and unending laughter, I ended my day locked in my room doing nothing. 

I was so bored so I browsed all the photo albums in my facebook account. 

When I saw my album with all of my pictures with "him" (C) I took time to think whether I will look at it or skip the album but I did not. At first, I was okay, doing fine while looking at the pictures and suddenly tears fell down and I don't know why. ( with the background music of "FOREVER and FOREVER YOU AND FOREVER GONE" by Claude Kelly) Then all the memories I had with him flashed back in my head and it made me cry again :(( I stopped, got up from the chair and tried to do something else. I was cleaning my room, fixing all my stuffs until I saw a piece of paper under my books. I didn't know if that is a letter or just a scratch paper, I almost threw it in the trash can but I checked it first because it might be an important paper or something. 

I was right! It was indeed so important for me because it is the first letter that he gave me. If I am not mistaken, it is his retreat letter for me. I wanted to put some of the messages here that really made me cry for the rest of the night so you would understand why it still hurts so bad. So until 2am I was just crying in my bed until I fell asleep.  I broke my promise to myself that I would never cry myself again to sleep. I just can't control my emotions when it comes to that. I always say to myself that it is the last time that I will cry because of him but moments like this still happen. It's just because it's still here. That's the fact that I can't deny and even though I am 100% sure that things will never be the same again between us, one thing will surely last. Me, being true to him, being true with my feelings. Yes it is done but I guess the love I had for him will last forever. My friend told me that she can see that I am moved on right now but the reason why I still cry because of him is because the love is still here in me. That would never change because that is real. She also said that I may meet new one who could replace my first love. I may love another guy as I love the first one but I can never erase the fact that I once loved him so it will be there forever no matter what. 

I hope...I really do hope that I'm done crying for nothing. But if ever I will cry again, I guess it's just my way of releasing my emotions and sadness as well so I can go on with my life and be happy. 

To my friends who always witness me crying or listening to my unending stories of heartache THANK YOU SO MUCH for lending me your ears to listen, heart to feel my pain, and shoulders to cry on. Thank you for not leaving me especially in times when I feel so depress. Thank you for trying your very best to make me happy and find ways for me to forget him and everything that's not worth remembering.

THANK GOD for giving me these people who never fail to comfort me and make me feel better when I'm lost. I'M STILL LUCKY! :"> 

like an ICEBERG :">

YOU MAKE ME MELT LIKE AN ICEBERG on the sea.

You make me melt...never ever been this weak

This is all brand new to me

I think I should tell you that...

YOU MAKE ME MELT :">

Now I don't mind lettin' my guard down

My heart is yours now

Now I've always been, the cool independent type

But now I'm different when I look in your eyes

And I try to play it as cool as ice

BUT YOU MAKE ME MELT EVERY TIME

okay I'm in love with this song because of this night!

Just went to Encore to watch the SOIT night of Mapua and I had a blast night!

It was tiring to walk with my heels even if I can't walk properly because my legs still hurt. :|

But of course it can't hinder me from watching this event because I want to support the candidates from Mapua Dancecom, Kurt Mendoza and Angge Galang :D

It was a successful night for the both of them because they won different special awards like the Mr. and Ms. Talent and the Mr. and Ms. Glance. No doubt, they out shined others for that night! They got lots of supporters and honestly (without bias) for me, they are far way better than the others. Looks, talent, charm, chemistry and appeal...they all got that! :D YEAH! \m/

Probably you now wonder why I put that song above...LOL =))

"Like an iceberg" by Claude Kelly

I can't deny the fact the I really melted because of him! Yes, him! HAHA =))

His smile, his look, his stance made me smile the whole night even though my feet is already crying of pain.

Then I just realized that I still have a written report to be submitted the next day.....CRAMMING AGAIN! :|

But it didn't ruin my night. It didn't hinder me to stay happy because I really enjoyed the event that nothing can take it back. I can't get over of what happened during the pageant so instead of me doing my report when I got home, I just looked at the pictures I took. 

It was quite long now before I experience this kind of happiness again. Happiness because of a "HAPPY CRUSH". I wish no one would misinterpret this. Well after all there's nothing wrong with admiring someone. Who would not, if they see him wear that elegant suite, dance with that muscle shirt, and smile like there's no tomorrow! :">

CONGRATULATIONS KURT AND ANGGE! :D

"'pag may tiyaga may nilaga!" \m/

2 weeks before the finals...we have to prepare for this! :| DANCE AND WORK  HARD!


I was told by our choreographer to practice stunts and set my schedule for a gymnastics session. I felt so much pressure and stress because I don't really like being pressured by the stunts that I have to do in our routine. I am used to just being the dancer of the group because I'm not good at doing stunts. Most of the time I just want to exert all my efforts and energy with the dance only and not with those crazy tricks that others do. But for this one, I said to myself that I should face my fears and dilemma because nobody will ask me to do this if they believe that I can't. So if others believe that I can, therefore I should trust myself and believe as well that I can! :D


Good thing the day after, my high school dance troupe will go to gym and train also so I decided to go with them. I felt so happy that I can still be with them even if I am already an alumna of the group for two years. Obviously, I am the oldest that time training for gymnastics and I have to be a good example for them and encourage them to work hard because this is for our groups. But I have to admit, they are better than me with this thing! LOL =)) They go to gymnastics every day so they are used to body pains and everything that you have to deal with practicing stunts. And me, it is again my first time to practice this so what do you expect! Of course another ultimate body pain. I was right! Body pain and all kinds of "ache's" said hello to me! HAHA! It's all because I never stop practicing the "backhand spring" in the gym until I can do it right. Unfortunately I still can't do it. I understand that you cannot do something by trying and practicing it for only three hours. Our coach in the gym said that I should come back and practice again. How will I do that if I already can't bend my legs because it hurts a lot? :(( HUHU. I can't even go up and down the stairs and sit normally. 


Back to our training hours...I was encouraged by my friend who went to the gym also and train to practice his break dance moves and tricks. He is so good at it like woah! And every time I was the one to do what I was practicing, he would always shout "'PAG MAY TIYAGA, MAY NILAGA" and it worked for me. That's why I never stopped that time. I am frustrated already that I still can't do it. At the end of the day, I was tired but a bit confident because I know I tried to do it, even if I still can't do it right at least I know the feeling of doing it. And that's more important than being frustrated doing nothing. 

i miss my friend ^_^

I MISS the time we eat in KFC because it's your favorite
I MISS the time when we cover our eyes if someone tries to take our picture together
I MISS the time when you always accompany me anywhere i plan to go
I MISS the time that you are always at my side when we are walking
I MISS the time when we imitate those stupid biters of dances =))
I MISS the kwentuhan moments of ours every after workshop outside the studio
I MISS your arms that are always around me
I MISS our table tennis match and how you defeated me. CHINESE ka nga! HAHA =))
I MISS the moments when you always try to pull my shirt up because it is too revealing for you
I MISS your kiss on my forehead
I MISS how you hold my head
I MISS how you support me in every events i perform
I MISS those pretty smiles that lighten up my days
I MISS how you try to fix my hair even if you don't know how
I MISS my "gentleman"
I MISS the moment when you always ask me if you look good on what you are wearing
I MISS how you cover my eyes when i try to window shop
I MISS our one wish to dance together as partners
I MISS your lap where I used to sit 
I MISS how I remind you to take care of yourself when doing those crazy stunts
I MISS EVERYTHING THAT'S YOU...EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU!

Though I hate looking at our pictures and reminisce 
I can't help it but stay looking at it
It's the closest thing I have to you


And even thought the love is gone
I still remember the good times
While I live my life yours will go on
Yes, time will pass but the love we had will last

And most of all, I MISS MY FRIEND ^_^